[ To his credit: He doesn't flinch. He does stiffen in surprise at how easily he switches to it. And even if he doesn't quite feel things from him, he doesn't think it's a lie. It's why the drink goes down and his brows furrow together. ]
... And you think that's something the ship can give you? Why?
Well, supposedly we're all immortal so you might have trouble with the first one.
Mild.
[ He quiets as he looks at the drink and for a brief moment - even to Sam who knows him little he's perhaps not the same kid. Quiet. Still. Like he's sucking in the world around him.
He bites the inside of his lip. ]
I'm not sure that's an answer you'll get here. Or, maybe it will be but that's - maybe not the reason you should be here?
... Not sure how to describe caring about people as more than that, honestly?
[ a beat. ]
I guess it's like if we assume those that are "Ghosts" are like us and also "Legends" or on the way to become Legends or whatever... They've also been forgotten. No one on Disorder cared about them and the only thing people are interested in is getting information from them.
Which, yeah, I get but - they were still people. They are still people - just like us. It'd suck to only be cared about because I might be useful or whatever so I... try to talk to them and visit? And stuff. I don't ask about any of that and -
[ shrugs. ] I don't know what I'm trying to say. Just, that's how I "care" in that case. I know it probably sounds ridiculous.
In a world where too many memories strips us of our humanity— our ability to care for others—how will you overcome making sure they are all not forgotten?
[ The way Sam asks the question is with actual interest rather than any condescending tone or attempt to 'show' why his way of thinking is right or wrong. It's pure interest, intrigue and genuine curiosity on what Phoenix and his point of view has to offer for such a dilemma. ]
So if they're real then I'm the reincarnated son of a witch and an android. I'm their literal wish come true. I shouldn't even exist or be real, but here I am.
[ a beat okay so that's barely an explanation. ]
Did you know I'm an amnesiac? Here and there. It's - part of the reincarnation package. I only remembered a name there. My twin's name - I couldn't remember anything else. But eventually I was able to remember the moment we died and that let me bring him back from just a memory.
"Family is forever. We could never really leave each other even if we tried."
[ he's not sure that even gets to half the explanation but- ]
[ there a lot of potential things here, but Sam isn't quite sure what line of thinking Phoenix is going down. Still, he is much not interested in hearing more rather than less. ]
So are you suggesting that memories can't take away our humanity? Or that you can hold onto your memories and retain your humanity here? Or...?
I'm saying I refuse to let that happen. I won't forget who I am. I will always be me. Whoever I decide that is - all of it. That everything about who I am and where I come from counteracts that and I'll find the power to make sure it stays that way.
Which I know sounds like wishful thinking, but I came from wishful thinking. I'm going to believe in it. For all of us.
And who's to say that's not a misleading? A world where too many memories makes you lose your humanity?
It feels to me like the world forgot them and in doing so they started losing who parts of them are. There's a reason why talking to the "Ghosts" is encouraged and why they respond more the more you talk to them. There's a reason we're being told their stories. There's a reason no one else seems to really know who they are.
Maybe people with too many memories - a too long life or whatever - change and forget what it's like. But I -
No. I feel too much to believe there will be a day where everyone here forgets their humanity.
It could be, but two of the "ghosts" in Cirrus suffered this ailment or whatever we might call it. So unless the ghosts are lying, it probably isn't misleading.
Re: DAY 268; early afternoon
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It also depends on if you're trying to avert the question.
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Not so! I'm just trying to gauge which angle I should best tell you the answer from.
Re: DAY 268; early afternoon
You don't have to tell me it at an angle. You can just say it in whatever is feel is true.
[ he shrugs a little moving to take a drink but first: ] I'm not going to flinch or whatever.
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I came back to find a reason to live or a way to die.
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... And you think that's something the ship can give you? Why?
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Mild.
[ He quiets as he looks at the drink and for a brief moment - even to Sam who knows him little he's perhaps not the same kid. Quiet. Still. Like he's sucking in the world around him.
He bites the inside of his lip. ]
I'm not sure that's an answer you'll get here. Or, maybe it will be but that's - maybe not the reason you should be here?
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Do you know what the most obvious way to become a Legend is?
Re: DAY 268; early afternoon
[ immediately: ] I don't care about becoming a Legend I care about the people behind them.
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[ a beat. ]
I guess it's like if we assume those that are "Ghosts" are like us and also "Legends" or on the way to become Legends or whatever... They've also been forgotten. No one on Disorder cared about them and the only thing people are interested in is getting information from them.
Which, yeah, I get but - they were still people. They are still people - just like us. It'd suck to only be cared about because I might be useful or whatever so I... try to talk to them and visit? And stuff. I don't ask about any of that and -
[ shrugs. ] I don't know what I'm trying to say. Just, that's how I "care" in that case. I know it probably sounds ridiculous.
Re: DAY 268; early afternoon
Not at all. I just wonder...
[ he takes a sip of his hot chocolate. ]
In a world where too many memories strips us of our humanity— our ability to care for others—how will you overcome making sure they are all not forgotten?
[ The way Sam asks the question is with actual interest rather than any condescending tone or attempt to 'show' why his way of thinking is right or wrong. It's pure interest, intrigue and genuine curiosity on what Phoenix and his point of view has to offer for such a dilemma. ]
Re: DAY 268; early afternoon
Literally not an option.
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[ go on. ]
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Re: DAY 268; early afternoon
So if they're real then I'm the reincarnated son of a witch and an android. I'm their literal wish come true. I shouldn't even exist or be real, but here I am.
[ a beat okay so that's barely an explanation. ]
Did you know I'm an amnesiac? Here and there. It's - part of the reincarnation package. I only remembered a name there. My twin's name - I couldn't remember anything else. But eventually I was able to remember the moment we died and that let me bring him back from just a memory.
"Family is forever. We could never really leave each other even if we tried."
[ he's not sure that even gets to half the explanation but- ]
Re: DAY 268; early afternoon
So are you suggesting that memories can't take away our humanity? Or that you can hold onto your memories and retain your humanity here? Or...?
1/2
I'm saying I refuse to let that happen. I won't forget who I am. I will always be me. Whoever I decide that is - all of it. That everything about who I am and where I come from counteracts that and I'll find the power to make sure it stays that way.
Which I know sounds like wishful thinking, but I came from wishful thinking. I'm going to believe in it. For all of us.
Re: DAY 268; early afternoon
It feels to me like the world forgot them and in doing so they started losing who parts of them are. There's a reason why talking to the "Ghosts" is encouraged and why they respond more the more you talk to them. There's a reason we're being told their stories. There's a reason no one else seems to really know who they are.
Maybe people with too many memories - a too long life or whatever - change and forget what it's like. But I -
No. I feel too much to believe there will be a day where everyone here forgets their humanity.
Re: DAY 268; early afternoon
Re: DAY 268; early afternoon
Then we rewrite it.
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Re: DAY 268; early afternoon
We're going to find a way. I refuse to let that be the end for anyone here.
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